Author: Margaretha Montagu

Because the Habit of Reflection can separate Extraordinary Successful Professionals from Highly Successful Ones

As the year winds down, it’s easy to get caught up in the holiday rush and the flurry of end-of-year deadlines. But amidst the chaos, this powerful tool often gets overlooked: Year-End Reflection. Whether you’re a seasoned executive, a rising star in your field, or someone who’s consistently making waves in your industry, taking the time to reflect on the past year can be a game-changer.

Year-end reflection isn’t just about looking back on what you’ve accomplished. It’s about analysing your performance, increasing your impact and setting yourself up for even greater success in the future. Think of it as your secret weapon—a way to refuel, recalibrate, and ensure you’re in top shape to continue thriving.

So pour yourself a cup of your favourite beverage, and let’s dive into why year-end reflection is essential for high-performing high-impactful professionals like you. Trust me, you’ll thank yourself later!

Enhancing Self-Awareness and Growth

Reflecting on the past year allows you to gain deeper insights into your performance, decision-making processes, and overall impact. By examining your thoughts, feelings, and behaviour over the past year, you can identify patterns and areas for improvement, which is crucial for your continuous personal and professional development.

Optimising Performance

Reflection enables you to:

1. Evaluate your achievements and challenges
2. Assess the effectiveness of your strategies
3. Set more meaningful and impactful objectives in the future

This process helps you align your future objectives with your values and long-term plans, increasing the likelihood of sustained success.

Cultivating Resilience and Adaptability

By reflecting on how you managed challenges throughout the year, you can:

• Build confidence in your problem-solving abilities
• Develop greater resilience in the face of adversity
• Enhance your adaptability to changing circumstances

This reflection on overcoming obstacles can be particularly empowering and motivating for future challenges.

Maintaining Perspective and Work-Life Balance

As a high-achiever, you may risk burnout due to your intense focus on performance. Year-end reflection provides an opportunity for you to step back and assess your overall well-being, ensuring that you maintain a healthy work-life balance. It allows you to recalibrate your priorities and make necessary adjustments for sustainable success.

Leveraging Insights for Strategic Planning

For you as a purposeful professional, reflection is not just about personal growth but also about refining your strategic approach. By analysing what worked well and what didn’t, you can make more informed decisions about resource allocation, team management, and long-term planning in your professional role.

Increase Innovation and Creativity

Taking time to reflect can spark new ideas and approaches for you. By stepping away from the day-to-day grind and considering the bigger picture, you can identify innovative solutions to persistent challenges or uncover new opportunities for more impact.

Year-end reflection is a powerful tool for you as a high-performing high-impact professional. It not only enhances your personal performance but also contributes to your overall effectiveness and long-term success in your impactful role.

How to go about it? You can put the suggestions below into practice or you can engage an experienced mentor to guide and support you as you implement each suggestion. Find out more about the Infinite Impact Program from TouchStone Consultancy by sending an email to OpenLockedDoors@gmail.com to schedule a complimentary 30-minute discovery call.

How can you Reflect Constructively on the Past Year?

Set Aside Dedicated Time

First things first, you need to carve out some quality time for this reflection process. I’m not talking about squeezing it in between meetings or during your lunch break. No. You need to block out some serious “me time” on your calendar. Treat it like you would any important business meeting—because, let’s face it, this is a meeting with your most valuable asset: YOU.

Find a quiet, comfortable space where you won’t be disturbed.

Review your Objectives and Achievements

Alright, let’s start with the fun stuff—celebrating your wins! Pull out that list of goals you set at the beginning of the year. Remember those? The ones you scribbled down with enthusiasm and determination. How did you do?

Celebrate Achievements

Did you crush those sales targets? Mastered a new skill? Lead a successful project? Give yourself a pat on the back. Celebrating your achievements is not just about feeling good; it’s about acknowledging your hard work and building confidence for future challenges.

Identify Gaps

Now, let’s talk about the goals that didn’t quite go as planned. It’s okay; we all have them. The important thing is to understand why. Were the goals too ambitious? Did unexpected obstacles pop up? Or maybe you just didn’t prioritise them highly enough? Be honest with yourself. This isn’t about beating yourself up; it’s about learning and getting stronger.

Analyse Your Performance

Time to get a bit more analytical. Let’s evaluate the nitty-gritty of your performance.

Key Performance Indicators (KPIs)

Pull out those KPIs and metrics. How did you stack up against them? Were you hitting your numbers consistently, or were there fluctuations? Understanding your performance data can provide valuable insights into what’s working and what’s not.

Feedback

Feedback is a gift, even if it doesn’t always feel like it. Reach out to colleagues, superiors, and subordinates. Ask for their honest opinions about your performance. What did they see as your strengths? Where do they think you could improve? Remember, the goal is to get a well-rounded view of your performance, not just to hear what you want to hear.

Self-Assessment

Now, turn the mirror on yourself. What do you see as your strengths and weaknesses? Be brutally honest. This is your chance to identify areas where you truly excel and where you might need a bit more polish.

Reflect on Challenges and New Skills

Life is full of challenges, and the past year was no exception. Let’s take a look at the hurdles you faced and the lessons you learned.

Challenges Faced

What were the big challenges of the year? Maybe it was a tough project, a difficult client, or a major organizational change. How did you handle them? Did you rise to the occasion, or did you struggle? Reflect on your approach and the outcomes.

Lessons Learned

Every challenge is an opportunity to learn. What did you take away from these experiences? How can you apply these lessons in the future? Whether it’s a new strategy, a different mindset, or a skill you honed, these learnings are invaluable.

Mistakes and Failures

Let’s talk about the elephant in the room: mistakes and failures. We all make them, and they’re not something to be swept under the rug. Instead, embrace them as learning opportunities. What went wrong? Why? How can you avoid similar pitfalls in the future? Remember, failure is just a stepping stone to success.

Evaluate your Work-Life Balance

Work-life balance—it’s a phrase we hear a lot, but how well did you actually achieve it this year?

Balance Assessment

Take a hard look at how you balanced your professional and personal life. Were there times when work took over everything? Or maybe you found a good rhythm that allowed you to enjoy both worlds. Identify the areas where you might have neglected one for the other.

Stress Management

Stress is a part of life, especially for high-performers. How did you manage your stress levels this year? Did you have effective coping mechanisms, or did you find yourself burning the candle at both ends? Reflect on what worked and what didn’t.

Well-being

Your overall well-being IS crucial. How did you fare in terms of physical health, mental health, and emotional well-being? Did you take care of yourself, or did you let self-care slide? Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup.

Examine Professional Relationships

Your professional relationships can make or break your career. Let’s take a closer look at how you nurtured these connections.

Networking

Did you build new relationships this year? How did you nurture your existing network? Networking isn’t just about collecting business cards; it’s about building meaningful connections that can support your career growth.

Mentorship

Mentorship is a two-way street. Did you seek out mentors to guide you, or did you mentor others? Reflect on these relationships and how they contributed to your growth. Whether you were the mentor or the mentee, these interactions can provide valuable insights.

Team Dynamics

How did you interact with your team? Did you support and motivate them effectively? Team dynamics can significantly impact your performance and the overall success of your projects. Reflect on your role within the team and how you can improve.

Review your Professional Development

Continuous learning is key to staying at the top of your game. Let’s see how you fared in this department.

Skills Acquired

What new skills or knowledge did you acquire this year? How did these contribute to your performance? Whether it was a new certification, a workshop, or on-the-job learning, these additions to your skillset are worth noting.

Continuous Learning

Reflect on your commitment to continuous learning. Did you engage in any training, courses, or workshops? How did these experiences enhance your capabilities? In today’s fast-paced world, staying current is essential.

Future Development

Identify areas where you need further development. What skills or knowledge gaps do you need to address? Plan how to tackle these in the coming year. Whether it’s through formal education, online courses, or hands-on experience, have a clear path forward.

Seek External Perspectives

Sometimes, we need a fresh pair of eyes to see things clearly. Don’t be afraid to seek external perspectives.

Mentors and Coaches

Consult with mentors, coaches, or trusted advisors. Their insights and guidance can provide valuable perspectives that you might not have considered. They’ve been where you are and can offer wisdom from their experiences.

Peer Feedback

Engage in peer reviews or feedback sessions. Your peers can offer different viewpoints on your performance. Sometimes, the people who work closest to you can provide the most insightful feedback.

Document, Update and Review

Documentation is key to effective reflection. Keep a journal of your insights and progress. This will serve as a valuable reference for future reflections.

Journaling

Jot down your thoughts, observations, and plans. Journaling can help you process your reflections more deeply and provide a record of your growth over time. Plus, it’s a great way to look back and see how far you’ve come.

Regular Check-ins

Schedule regular check-ins throughout the year to monitor your progress. Don’t wait until the end of the year to see how you’re doing. Regular check-ins allow you to make adjustments and stay on track.

Celebrate and Recharge

Finally, don’t forget to celebrate your achievements and take time to recharge. You’ve worked hard, and you deserve it.

Celebrate Successes

Take time to celebrate your successes, no matter how big or small. Acknowledge your hard work. Celebrating your wins is not just about feeling good; it’s about building confidence and motivation for future challenges.

Recharge

Ensure you take time to recharge and refresh. This could include taking a vacation, engaging in hobbies, or spending quality time with loved ones. Recharging is essential for maintaining your energy and enthusiasm. Remember, you can’t pour from an empty cup.

The Infinite Impact Program

Over my extensive career as a medical doctor (MBChB, MRCGP) and transformational retreat leader, I’ve had the privilege of helping countless professionals navigate life’s most significant personal and professional transitions. By combining my interest in stress management, my knowledge of positive psychology and medical expertise with advanced certifications in medical hypnotherapy, NLP and professional life coaching, I’ve developed The Infinite Impact Program to help high achievers live purposeful, meaningful and impactful lives.

Ready to take the first step towards a purposeful, impactful and fulfilling life?

Schedule your complimentary 30-minute call today and discover how The Infinite Impact Program can transform your life. Let’s explore how you can align your success with a lasting legacy that can change lives.

Don’t miss this opportunity to invest in your future and make a difference that will echo for generations to come.

Ready to start again, stronger than ever before? This quiz will help you find out. It is not just about measuring where you are right now; it’s about shining a light on the areas of your life that feel meaningful, as well as those that might need attention. It’s an opportunity to reflect, recalibrate, and take steps toward a life that’s not only successful but profoundly fulfilling. Take The Quiz

Get rid of the nagging emptiness of “Is this all there is?” and step into a life where your accomplishments feel as purposeful, meaningful and fulfilling as they are impressive. This unique mentoring program empowers you to unearth the mission that sets your soul on fire and aligns your life with what truly matters to you—beyond success metrics and societal expectations.

“I am an experienced medical doctor – MBChB, MRCGP, NLP master pract cert, Transformational Life Coach (dip.) Life Story Coach (cert.) Counselling (cert.) Med Hypnotherapy (dip.) and EAGALA (cert.) I may have an impressive number of letters after my name, and more than three decades of professional experience, but what qualifies me to excel at what I do is my intuitive understanding of my clients’ difficulties and my extensive personal experience of managing major life changes using strategies I developed over many years” Dr M Montagu

Discover Your Soul’s Purpose, Create an Impactful Legacy and Embody Peace of Mind

Introduction

As someone who’s always valued making a meaningful impact, I often wonder: What will I leave behind? Not just in terms of possessions or professional achievements, but in the lives I’ve changed. This question was the spark that ignited a deeper quest: leaving a legacy that continues to change people’s lives. I’ve found that this question resonates particularly strongly with successful professionals who have already achieved their initial goals.

Over my extensive career as a medical doctor (MBChB, MRCGP) and transformational retreat leader, I’ve had the privilege of helping countless professionals navigate life’s most significant personal and professional transitions. By combining my interest in stress management, my knowledge of positive psychology and medical expertise with advanced certifications in medical hypnotherapy, NLP and professional life coaching, I’ve developed a unique approach to helping high achievers create purposeful, meaningful and impactful lives and legacies.

You’ve scaled the heights of success—built a business, reached various career milestones, and secured financial stability. Whether you’re a business owner who’s built something from the ground up or a corporate leader who’s climbed every rung on the ladder—you’ve likely wondered the same. Success may have been the goal at first, but now, a deeper longing calls: the desire to build a lasting legacy.

But here’s the thing about legacy: it’s about more than wealth or accomplishments. It’s about ensuring that the path you’ve walked continues to inspire and guide others in the future.

In this post, we’ll explore what leaving a legacy truly means, why it’s essential for high achievers, and how life transitions—like the shift from a full-time career to (partial) retirement, for example—offer the perfect opportunity to focus on building a legacy that reflects your unique journey. And yes, I’ll sprinkle in some humour, as always, because crafting a legacy is serious business, but that doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy the process.

“Live, love, laugh, leave a legacy.” Stephen Covey, Author of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

By the end, you’ll see how you can take practical steps to discover your soul’s purpose and live your legacy, with a little help from the exclusive mentoring program I’ve designed for leaders like you. After all, the best legacies aren’t left to chance—they’re built with intention, care, and a dash of creativity.

Why a Legacy Matters

For high achievers, success often becomes synonymous with professional milestones—the business you built, the career accolades, the financial security. Yet, as the dust settles on these admirable accomplishments, many of us find ourselves asking: Is this all there is?

Leaving a legacy isn’t just about wealth or achievements; it’s about ensuring that the life you’ve lived continues to make a positive impact on others. A legacy reflects your values, the relationships you’ve nurtured, and the difference you’ve made in the world. For business owners and corporate leaders nearing retirement, this reflection often marks the start of a new chapter—one where significance takes precedence over success.

“Before you are a leader, success is all about growing yourself. When you become a leader, success is all about growing others.” Jack Welch, Former CEO of GE

Think of your legacy as your final masterpiece. It’s not just about what you’ve achieved but what you’ve contributed to the lives of others. And the good news? You don’t have to figure it out alone.

Types of Legacies

Your legacy is as unique as your journey, and it can take many forms. Let’s explore some possibilities:

Professional Impact

Perhaps you’ve built a business that uplifts your community, developed innovations that will outlast you or mentored the next generation of leaders. But building a lasting professional legacy goes beyond business success. It encompasses the systems you’ve put in place, the culture you’ve cultivated, and the people you’ve developed. Studies support the power of professional mentorship – A study by Forbes, published in 2022, reveals that 71% of executives stated that mentorship played a critical role in their career success.  Whether through creating sustainable business practices, developing industry-changing innovations, or nurturing future leaders, your professional legacy can transform careers and organizations for generations to come.

Personal Influence

The impact you have on family and close relationships forms the heart of your personal legacy. This encompasses the values you demonstrate daily, the wisdom you share, and the traditions you establish. Your personal legacy lives on through the stories shared at family gatherings, the principles that guide your loved ones’ decisions, and the lasting bonds you help create. Through consistent modelling of values and the creation of meaningful family traditions, you can shape how future generations approach life’s challenges and opportunities.

Philanthropy

Strategic giving can create ripples of positive change that extend far beyond your lifetime. In 2022, Americans donated $326 billion to charity (National Philanthropic Trust), with many donors focused on creating sustainable, long-term impact. Effective philanthropy involves more than just financial contributions – it’s about identifying causes that align with your values and creating systematic change. Whether through establishing educational scholarships, supporting environmental initiatives, or funding social programs, philanthropic legacies can address society’s most pressing challenges while inspiring others to give back.

Not sure where to start? Discover causes that align with your values at Charity Navigator.

Each of these legacy types is built on a foundation of intentionality—a commitment to align your actions with the values that matter most to you. Whether it’s through professional mentorship, supporting causes or personal relationships, your example can guide and uplift those who follow.

Designing Your Legacy

Creating a legacy isn’t a passive process. It requires introspection, planning, and focused and determined action. Here are some practical steps to get started:

1. Clarify Your Values: Ask yourself, What truly matters to me? This clarity will serve as a compass for your legacy-building efforts.
2. Identify Your Unique Contributions: Reflect on your career, relationships, and passions. What have you done that’s uniquely yours? What impact do you want to amplify?
3. Set a Vision for Your Legacy: Visualize what you want your legacy to look like. Is it a thriving business that continues to support others? A family that carries on your values? A community bettered by your generosity?
4. Take Action: Legacy building is as much about the creation as the outcome. Start aligning your actions with your vision today. Consider journaling your thoughts to capture your evolving ideas.

For more inspiration, consider reading A Life Worth Living by Robert Martensen.

Your Legacy and Life Transitions

Life transitions—selling your business, changing careers or even a simple shift in priorities—are prime opportunities to focus on legacy building. These moments allow you to pause, reflect, and redefine what’s next. Many leaders find that having appropriate guidance and a structured support system during these pivotal times can be invaluable and make the difference between simply retiring and retiring with purpose.

This understanding of the challenges that come with major life transitions led me to develop my Touchstone Mentoring program. Designed specifically for affluent professionals navigating important crossroads, the program provides both one-on-one guidance and also gives access to immersive experiences during my Touchstone Retreats. Set in my 200-year-old farmhouse in the sun-blessed southwest of France, these transformative experiences help you gain clarity, reconnect with your values, and design a legacy that aligns with your purpose. It’s about more than planning; it’s about creating a truly impactful life.

Life changes offer the perfect opportunity to redefine your purpose and focus on what truly matters.

The Benefits of Creating a Legacy

Creating an intentional legacy yields profound rewards that enrich both your life and the lives of others. When you actively engage in legacy building, you’ll discover a deeper sense of fulfilment as your actions align with your most cherished values. This purposeful approach transforms daily decisions into meaningful stepping stones toward lasting impact.

The continuity your legacy provides ensures your values and contributions ripple forward through time. Like a stone cast into still waters, your influence extends far beyond its initial impact. Business leaders who consciously build their legacy often find their organisational values and culture persist long after their departure, while philanthropists see their initial investments multiply through generations of positive change.

Legacy building also strengthens vital connections across generations. As you share your experiences, wisdom, and values, you create bridges between the past and the future. Families report stronger bonds when they actively discuss and participate in building their shared legacy, while business leaders find that legacy planning facilitates more meaningful mentorship relationships with emerging talent.

Perhaps most importantly, the process of legacy building brings remarkable clarity to your life’s purpose. As you define the impact you want to have, your priorities naturally align with your deeper values. This clarity proves especially valuable during life transitions, helping you make decisions that serve both your immediate needs and your long-term vision.

The transformative power of legacy building extends beyond personal benefits. Those who actively engage in creating their legacy often find themselves better equipped to navigate major life changes, from career transitions to retirement. Their clear sense of purpose provides a steady compass during times of change, helping them transform challenges into opportunities for meaningful impact.

Crafting your legacy is one of the most meaningful ways to channel your achievements into a life of lasting significance.

“Your legacy ensures that your values, contributions, and influence continue to shape the world long after you’re gone.” Dr Margaretha Montagu

Live Your Legacy

Your legacy isn’t just something you leave behind; it’s something you live every day. Legacy building isn’t just about the future—it’s about making intentional choices in your daily life to reflect your core values. By aligning your actions with your values and focusing on what truly matters, you can ensure that your life’s work continues to inspire, uplift, and make a difference.

Ready to Create Your Legacy?

If you’re ready to transform your life’s achievements into a meaningful, lasting legacy, I invite you to take the first step. Email me at openlockeddoors@gmail.com with the subject line “Touchstone Consultation” to schedule a complimentary 30-minute discovery call. During our conversation, we’ll:

• Explore your vision for your legacy
• Discuss how my mentoring program can support you
• Determine if we’re the right fit for working together

Don’t leave your legacy to chance. Reach out today, and let’s start building your extraordinary legacy together. The best legacies aren’t left to chance—they’re built with intention, care, and determination.

“All good men and women must take responsibility to create legacies that will take the next generation to a level we could only imagine.” Jim Rohn

Stumbling Blocks or Stepping Stones?

You are working all hours at your disposal to reach your goal and then suddenly…yet another setback! As unwelcome as a speeding ticket on the day both your indicators fail.

Life rarely unfolds in a straight line. It’s a winding journey with peaks of triumph and valleys of challenges. At some point, we all face setbacks—moments when it feels like the rug has been whipped out from beneath us. Perhaps you missed a deadline at work after months of stellar performance, fell off your carefully planned health regimen, or faced rejection after years of hard work pursuing a dream. These moments can sting, making it tempting to dismiss your progress so far and label yourself a failure.

Don’t do that. One setback does not erase all the progress you have made so far.

What qualifies as a setback? I’d say a setback in life is an experience that disrupts your plans or expectations, often leading to feelings of disappointment or frustration. The keyword here is “disrupt,” not “destroy.” Setbacks come in all shapes and sizes, some more disruptive than others, each impacting different aspects of our lives:

Setback Categories

1. Personal Setbacks: These include injuries, illnesses, mental health challenges (such as anxiety or depression), and relationship issues (like breakups or divorce). Losses, whether of loved ones, jobs, or opportunities, also fall into this category.
2. Professional Setbacks: Common examples are failing in a critical meeting, being overlooked for a promotion, or facing a job loss. Such setbacks can significantly affect your career trajectory and self-esteem.
3. Financial Setbacks: These can arise from job loss, poor investments, or unexpected expenses that strain financial stability.
4. Environmental Setbacks: Natural disasters or significant changes in one’s living situation can also be classified as setbacks, as they often require a complete reevaluation of life circumstances.

Progress is Cumulative

The good news is that you can reframe setbacks as stepping stones toward long-term and lasting success.

Apparently. (I’m Gen X, we don’t believe everything we are told.)

Imagine climbing a mountain. Each step forward builds upon the last, bringing you closer to the summit. Now imagine slipping on loose gravel and sliding back a few feet. It’s frustrating, but it doesn’t erase the hundreds of steps you’ve already climbed. And you already know that way ahead, you know what to do to avoid slipping back. Similarly, in life, your progress accumulates. The skills you’ve developed, the lessons you’ve learned, and the resilience you’ve cultivated don’t vanish because of a single misstep.

For example, let’s say you’ve been diligently saving money for a big purchase. An unexpected expense—a car repair or medical bill—may force you to dip into your savings. While this feels like a setback, it doesn’t negate the discipline and effort you’ve shown in saving up to this point. You still have the knowledge and habits that enabled you to save in the first place, which means you can start building again.

The Danger of All-or-Nothing Thinking

One of the reasons setbacks feel so devastating is because of all-or-nothing thinking. This mindset convinces us that we’re either winning or failing, with no middle ground. When something goes wrong, it’s easy to spiral into negative self-talk:

• “I knew I couldn’t stick to this diet.”
• “Why do I even bother trying?”
• “I’m never going to achieve my goals.”

This kind of thinking ignores the nuances of progress. Setbacks are not proof of failure; they are a natural part of the process. In fact, they often highlight areas where growth is still needed, offering valuable opportunities to learn and adjust.

Reframing the Narrative

How you interpret a setback matters. Instead of viewing it as a sign that you’re not good enough, consider it a plot twist in your journey. Great stories—and great lives—are full of moments when the protagonist faces obstacles and emerges stronger.

Let’s look at a real-world example. Thomas Edison famously said, “I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” His “setbacks” were integral to his eventual success in inventing the light bulb. Reframing challenges as experiments, rather than verdicts on your worth, allows you to stay curious and become more resilient.

The next time you slam up against a setback, ask yourself:

1. What can I learn from this? Every setback carries a lesson, whether it’s about preparation, timing, or approach.
2. What have I already accomplished? Reflecting on your past successes can help you maintain perspective.
3. What’s the next small step I can take? Focusing on actionable steps keeps you moving forward.

Be Kind to Yourself

Many of us are far kinder to others than we are to ourselves. If your best friend or colleague faced a similar setback, you’d likely offer words of encouragement rather than criticism. So why not extend the same grace to yourself?

Practising self-compassion doesn’t mean letting yourself off the hook; it means acknowledging that you’re human. It’s about recognising that everyone stumbles and that your worth isn’t defined by your worst moments.

Here are some ways to practice self-compassion:

• Acknowledge your feelings. It’s okay to feel disappointed or frustrated. Naming your emotions can help you process them without becoming overwhelmed.
• Talk to yourself like a friend. Replace harsh self-criticism with supportive language.
• Focus on progress, not perfection. Celebrate the effort you’ve put in, even if the outcome wasn’t what you hoped for.

Stories of Resilience

Consider the story of J.K. Rowling, who faced numerous rejections before finding a publisher for Harry Potter. Her initial setbacks didn’t erase her talent or determination; they were stepping stones on the path to her eventual success.

Or think about someone recovering from a health setback, like an athlete rebuilding strength after an injury. Each day of rehab might feel slow and frustrating, but every session contributes to their eventual recovery. The same principle applies to personal or professional goals.

Or Gina, whose setback turned into a Comedy in Three Acts:

Gina was not the type to take a setback lying down. No, she preferred to face adversity the same way she faced IKEA furniture instructions: with creative swearing, a questionable plan, and a glass of wine.

Her major setback came on a Wednesday—because, of course, the universe saves its cruellest blows for the middle of the week, when you’re already teetering on the edge. Gina had just been passed over for the big promotion she was sure was hers. The new title? Gone. The corner office? Bye-bye. The salary bump she had earmarked for Bali yoga retreats and high-end sushi? RIP.

Instead, the promotion went to her office nemesis, Derek. Derek of the faux humility, Derek of the motivational Post-it notes, Derek who thought “circle back” was the pinnacle of workplace communication.

By 6:00 p.m., Gina had rage-Googled “How to hex your coworker legally” and eaten an entire bag of gummy worms while doom-scrolling Instagram. It wasn’t pretty.

Act II: The Breakthrough

The next morning, Gina decided she wasn’t going to wallow. No. She was going to manifest. She dusted off her vision board from 2019 (which was mostly pictures of Amal Clooney looking fabulous in pencil skirts) and got to work.

Step one? Rebrand herself. Derek may have won the battle, but Gina was about to win the war.

“I’m not bitter,” she told her friend Ellie over overpriced oat milk lattes. “I’m pivoting. Like Beyoncé in 2016 or whatever Taylor Swift does every five minutes.”

Ellie, the supportive kind who wasn’t above roasting Gina for fun, raised an eyebrow. “So, what’s the plan? Dramatic career change? Pet influencer? Enlisting in the army?”

“Better,” Gina said, her eyes sparkling with the kind of manic energy only a person with a vendetta could muster. “I’m going to become Derek’s boss.”

Ellie nearly choked on her latte. “You can’t even keep a basil plant alive, and now you’re planning a corporate coup?”

“Oh, it’s on,” Gina said. “I’m playing chess, not checkers.”

Act III: The Glow-Up

Gina went all in. She revamped her LinkedIn profile, signing up for every buzzword-filled certification she could find. “Certified in Agile Frameworks” meant nothing to her, but it looked killer in bold font. She started volunteering for high-visibility projects at work. She even took up jogging, because all the articles said “executive energy” came from early morning runs, though she mostly ended up lying on the pavement gasping like a stranded fish.

And then there was Derek. Sweet, oblivious Derek. Gina started complimenting him on his ideas—strategic flattery, of course—and subtly claiming credit for his successes, based on her advice, in team meetings.

“Gina’s insights really helped me refine that idea,” Derek had to admit.

“Happy to help!” she’d chirp, while mentally filing away his demise.

Within six months, Gina had a standing coffee with the VP of Operations and a reputation as a team player. Within a year, she was promoted. Not just promoted—promoted above Derek.

Epilogue: Revenge Is Best Served With a Side of Humor

On her first day as Derek’s boss, Gina waltzed into her new office. It had a view, a fancy ergonomic chair, and most importantly, a door she could close when Derek inevitably wandered in to “circle back” on something.

Derek, looking as smug as ever, poked his head in. “Hey, boss,” he said, drawing out the last word like it was a joke.

Gina grinned, leaning back in her chair. “Oh, Derek,” she said. “Why don’t you circle back later?”

And with that, she swivelled her chair dramatically toward the window, sipping her coffee like the queen she had always been.

So, when life hands you setbacks, turn them into setups (see below.)

Practical Strategies for Bouncing Back

When faced with a setback, it’s important to take proactive steps to regain momentum. Here are some strategies to help you:

1. Pause and Reflect: Take time to assess what happened. What factors contributed to the setback? What’s within your control to change moving forward?
2. Reconnect with Your Why: Remind yourself why you started in the first place. Whether it’s a healthier lifestyle, a meaningful career, or a stronger relationship, keeping your ultimate goal in mind can reignite your motivation.
3. Break It Down: Large goals can feel overwhelming, especially after a setback. Break them into smaller, manageable steps to rebuild confidence and momentum.
4. Seek Support: Don’t hesitate to reach out to friends, mentors, or support groups. Sharing your struggles can provide fresh perspectives and encouragement.
5. Celebrate Small Wins: Acknowledge every step forward, no matter how small. Progress is progress, and celebrating it reinforces a positive mindset.

The Upside of the Downside

Progress happens in fits and starts, and that’s okay. The path to success is often marked by detours, and setbacks are not the opposite of progress—they’re part of it. By reframing your perspective, practising self-compassion, and taking actionable steps to bounce back, you can transform setbacks into opportunities for growth.

Setbacks can be a goldmine for growth if you let them. When you reframe them as opportunities to learn, adapt, and connect, they stop being roadblocks and start becoming stepping stones to something bigger and better. So next time life knocks you down, remember: it’s just setting you up for an epic comeback.

Feeling Lost? Rediscover Who You Are and What’s Next by Finding Your Life Purpose

Setbacks can leave you feeling untethered—unsure of who you are, where you’re going, or how to move forward. It’s normal to feel anxious, even overwhelmed, to experience self-doubt, to worry about the future, and to feel isolated and unsupported.

My unique course, “Rearing to Get Going in a New Direction: Discover Your Real Life Purpose” offers the support you need to help you get your life back on track:

🌟 Overcome Uncertainty, Insecurity and Anxiety Gain clarity about your next steps and replace fear of the future with a renewed sense of direction. The course is structured to offer guidance, giving you the tools and strategies you need to navigate this transition as painlessly as possible.

🌟 Rediscover Your Identity Life transitions often cause identity crises. This course will guide you to reconnect with your core values, passions, and purpose so you can rediscover who you truly are.

🌟 Silence Self-Doubt and Reclaim Your Self-Confidence You’ll uncover your unique strengths and abilities, empowering you to face challenges with resilience and self-belief.

🌟 Free Yourself from Your Fear of Failure By focusing on meaningful goals and aligning your goals with your values the course minimises the fear of making the “wrong” decisions.

🌟 Identify Your Priorities Feeling overwhelmed? Together, we’ll pinpoint what will truly matter in your next chapter, helping you prioritise your time and energy with a purpose-driven focus, easing the overwhelm of conflicting demands.

🌟 Improve Your Communication Skills and Build Meaningful Connections By understanding yourself and what you want better, you’ll develop the confidence to express your needs clearly and authentically, paving the way for stronger, more fulfilling relationships.

Who would benefit from this course?

Anyone experiencing:

Midlife Changes: Reflecting on achievements and possibly changing life directions.
Retirement: Adjusting to life after a career and finding a new purpose.
Job Loss, Career Change or Starting a new Business: Facing the challenges of unemployment or moving to a new job.
Relocation: Adjusting to a new city or environment, which involves building new relationships and adapting to different social dynamics.
Health Issues: Coping with significant health diagnoses or injuries that alter daily life and future plans.
Loss of a Loved One: Managing grief and the emotional upheaval that follows the death of someone close.
Marriage or Divorce: Navigating the complexities of forming or dissolving significant relationships.
Achieving Significant Milestones: Such as paying off debt, achieving financial stability, or other personal accomplishments that require reevaluation of goals and identity.

How do I know I can help you? Is it because I am a medical doctor with two decades of experience helping my patients manage stress?

No. It’s because I’ve been there. I felt the raw fear, the knawing uncertainty, the paralysing doubts about the future.

I know from personal experience that life transitions can leave you feeling unmoored—uncertain about the future, disconnected from your sense of self, and unsure of how to move forward.

This isn’t the end—it’s the beginning of your next chapter.

This course is designed to guide you out of the fog of uncertainty and into a place of clarity. With tools inspired by the wisdom of horses and grounded in practical, immediately applicable strategies, you’ll gain the insights and direction you need to rediscover yourself and plot your path forward.

If you’re ready to replace confusion with clarity, fear with purpose, and doubt with confidence, this course is your roadmap to thriving in your next chapter.

You don’t have to do this on your own. Would you like to explore this course and rediscover your life purpose?

Let’s Get Going in a New Direction – together.

Author Bio: Dr Margaretha Montagu – described as a “game changer”, “gifted healer”, “guiding light” and “life-enriching author” – is an experienced medical doctor, a certified NLP practitioner, a medical hypnotherapist, an equine-assisted psychotherapist (EAGALAcertified) and a transformational retreat leader who guides her clients through life transitions – virtually, or with the assistance of her Friesian and Falabella horses, at their home in the southwest of France.

References:

Bushkin H, van Niekerk R, Stroud L. Searching for Meaning in Chaos: Viktor Frankl’s Story. Eur J Psychol. 2021 Aug 31;17(3):233-242.

Masten AS, Best KM, Garmezy N. Resilience and development: Contributions from the study of children who overcome adversity. Development and Psychopathology. 1990;2(4):425-444.

ten Broeke, Pam, and Marieke A. Adriaanse. “Understanding the setback effect in everyday self‐regulation.” European Journal of Social Psychology 53.4 (2023): 703-719.

Carlson, R. W., & Fishbach, A. (2024). Learning from failure. Motivation Science, 10(3), 160–170. 10. 10.1037/mot0000338.

ten Broeke, Pam, and Marieke A. Adriaanse. “Understanding the setback effect in everyday self‐regulation.” European Journal of Social Psychology 53.4 (2023): 703-719.