CIC Section 1

The Epicentre of Chaos Self-Audit: Mapping the Cracks in Your Foundation

Or, “How Leo Went From Boardroom Boss to Gas Station Sushi Connoisseur

Aim: Objectively assess crisis impact and identify outdated patterns.

• ✅ Recognise how crises expose “fault lines” (old beliefs, routines, relationships).
• ✅ Understand post-traumatic growth vs. PTSD and the science of stress.
• ✅ Use journaling to create mental distance and observe chaos non-judgmentally.

Let’s start with a story. The story of my friend Leo – I’ll let him tell it in his own words:

“I used to think I had my sh*t together.

I wore power blazers like armour, crushed quarterly reports like a caffeinated warlord, and prided myself on being the friend who “always had a plan.” Then, in 24 hours, my life went from Forbes to Floridian Gas Station Yelp Review.

Here’s the scene:

• Monday, 9 AM: Promoted to VP. Champagne toasts. LinkedIn humblebrags.
• Tuesday, 3 PM: Laid off. Crying in my Honda Civic, eating gas station sushi so questionable it could’ve starred in a Netflix true crime doc.

Was it tragic? Absolutely. Was it hilarious in hindsight? Oh hell yes. Because here’s the plot twist: That sushi moment was the best thing that ever happened to me.‘

Why?
Because life quakes don’t destroy you—they expose what was already broken.

Think of this section as your emotional metal detector. We’re going to sift through the rubble, find the fault lines (spoiler: they’re not flaws, they’re clues), and start drafting your rebuild/rebirth plan.

Part 1: The Science of Life Quakes (Or, Why Your Crisis is a Classroom)

A Crash Course in Post-Traumatic Growth

You’ve heard of PTSD. Let’s talk about its lesser-known, cooler cousin: Post-Traumatic Growth. Surprisingly, a high % of trauma survivors report positive psychological changes, like:

• Closer relationships (“Turns out vulnerability is a superpower”)
• Renewed purpose (“If I could survive this—what ELSE can I do?”)
• Spiritual awakening (“Not ‘woo-woo,’ just ‘Oh, there’s more to life than spreadsheets’”)

But here’s the catch: Growth isn’t automatic. It’s a choice.
You can stay stuck in “Why me?”
Or you can ask “What’s this trying to teach me?”

Journaling: Your Brain’s Bouncer

When chaos hits, your mind becomes a nightclub at 2 AM—overcrowded, sweaty, and playing terrible music. Journaling is the bouncer that says, “Okay, let’s clear this place out.”

Studies prove that expressive writing:

• Reduces cortisol (the stress hormone) by 19%
• Boosts problem-solving clarity by 30%
• Helps you spot patterns (“Wait, I’ve felt this way before…”)

In other words: Your journal is a $5 therapist.

Part 2: Leo’s Gas Station Sushi Epiphany (A Love Story)

Back to Leo’s Honda Civic meltdown.

“As I sat there, soy sauce dripping on my formerly-powerful blazer, I realised something:
I hadn’t lost my identity.

For years, I’d clung to titles like lifelines: VP. Go-Getter. Reliable One. But the quake ripped off the labels and forced me to ask:
“Who am I when I’m not achieving everything I set out to achieve? When I’m not ‘fine’? When I’m just… me?”

Terrifying? Yes. Liberating? Absolutely.”

Here’s what Leo’s quake exposed:

• Fault Line #1: “My worth = my productivity” (Spoiler: Nope.)
• Fault Line #2: “Asking for help = failure” (Double nope.)
• Fault Line #3: “Rest is for ‘weak people’” (Triple nope with a side of burnout.)

Your turn.

Part 3: Your Seismic Self-Audit Toolkit

Step 1: Play Geologist (But Sexier)

Geologists study earthquakes to predict future ones. You’re doing the same—minus the hard hat.

Grab your journal and ask:

“What ‘fault lines’ did this quake expose?”

• Old beliefs (“I have to be perfect”)
• Toxic routines (“Work ’til I’m numb”)
• Relationships (“Friends who only like ‘successful’ me”)

Pro Tip: If you’re stuck, finish this sentence: “I’m secretly relieved this quake happened because…”

Step 2: Borrow My “Messy First Draft” Hack

Anne Lamott said all good writing starts with a “sh*tty first draft.” Your self-audit does too.

Example from my 2008 journal:
“Maybe I’m not ‘failing’—maybe I’ve outgrown a life that’s too small.”

Your prompt:
“What’s one thing this crisis is FORCING you to notice?”

• Maybe it’s exhaustion you’ve ignored for years.
• A relationship that’s been one-sided since 2018.
• A dream you dismissed as “impractical” (but won’t stop popping up).

Part 4: Why Your Life Quake is the Best Wingman You’ll Ever Have

Let’s get poetic for a sec.

In Japan, there’s an art called kintsugi: repairing broken pottery with gold. The cracks aren’t hidden—they’re highlighted. Because the breaks are where the light gets in.

Your quake is doing the same. It’s saying:
“Here’s where you’ve been fragile. Here’s where you’ve been faking. Let’s gild those cracks and make you stronger than you’ve ever been before.”

But first, you have to get curious, not judgmental.

Your Journal Prompts: Time to Mine the Rubble

“What ‘fault lines’ (old beliefs, relationships, routines) did this quake expose?”

• Example: “My belief that ‘busy = worthy.’ Turns out, busy = burnt out.”
• Bonus: Circle the one that scares you most. That’s your gold.

“What’s one thing this crisis is FORCING you to notice?”

• Example: “I haven’t asked myself ‘What do I want?’ since 2015.”
• Bonus: Write it in lipstick on your mirror. (Trust me.)

“If this quake is a ‘brutally honest architect,’ what’s it telling you to demolish? To keep?”

• Example: “Get rid of: People-pleasing. Keep: My weird love of murder mystery novels.”

A Note on Judgment (Or, How to Stop Beating Yourself Up With a Mental Baseball Bat)

You might be thinking:
“If I’d just [worked harder/loved better/planned smarter], this wouldn’t have happened!”

Here’s the truth: Life quakes are not pop quizzes. They’re not punishments. They’re course corrections.

So if your inner critic starts ranting, borrow my favourite rebuttal:
“Thanks for your input, Karen. Now go bother someone else.”

What’s Next?

You’ve mapped your fault lines. You’ve spotted the cracks. In the next section, we’ll talk about coping with emotional tsunamis (yes, it’s possible).

P.S. Just a quick reminder: If you would like some support while you work through this program, you can book one or more coaching sessions with me (dr Margaretha Montagu) for inspiration, motivation and accountability (additional cost). Send an email to OpenLockedDoors@gmail.com to find out more. Most people book a coaching session at the end of the course, to help then implement what they have learned. Also, if at any time during this program you get stuck, email me at the email address above.

P.P.S. You’ve taken the first step toward stability by enrolling in this course. But what comes next? Once you get to the end of this course, you may wonder: Now what? If you’re already wondering about that, know that you don’t have to figure it out alone. There’s a roadmap to help you rediscover your direction – I’ll tell you more about The Purpose Protocol program in the next section.