50 Self-Compassion Quotes to Help You Through Major Life Changes

“Compassion for others begins with kindness to ourselves.”-Pema Chodron

What is Self-Compassion?

In short, self-compassion is about getting to know and accept yourself, forgiving yourself, loving yourself, helping yourself overcome insecurities, respecting yourself and protecting yourself. You’ll find more detailed definitions in the quotes below.

Why is being self-compassionate essential during life changes, challenges and transitions?

This is what I do, I help people through life changes, challenges and transitions by running my Manifest Your Next Chapter Retreats here at my little farm in the southwest of France. I have discovered that the people who navigate the storms of life with the least disruption are those who look after themselves during the process, with an abundance of self-acceptance and self-compassion.

– Major life changes often come with a mix of emotions—fear, anxiety, sadness, frustration, even guilt and depression. Mindfully practising self-compassion allows you to acknowledge these feelings without judgment, treating yourself the same kindness and understanding that you would a friend/loved one in a similar situation.

– During times of significant upheaval, it’s common to be hard on yourself, whether you’re blaming yourself for the situation or feeling like you’re not handling it “well enough.” Self-compassion helps counteract this negative self-talk by encouraging you to treat yourself with patience and forgiveness.

– Self-compassion can help you to accept the difficulties of a major life change without getting stuck in resistance or denial. This acceptance makes it easier to adapt to new realities. Self-compassion helps you see the change as a part of the human experience, allowing you to approach it with greater flexibility and creativity.

– When you approach a major life challenge with self-kindness, you’re better equipped to bounce back from setbacks. Instead of being overwhelmed by stress, you can view these changes as opportunities for growth and learning. This mindset fosters resilience, helping you to persevere through tough times.

– Life changes can be exhausting, both physically and emotionally. Self-compassion encourages you to take care of yourself during these times by prioritizing your well-being, s that you can manage stress more effectively and retain and replenish your energy over the long term as you adjust to the new circumstances.

How can reading self-compassion quotes help you during a major life crisis/change?

Reading self-compassion quotes can serve as gentle reminders to treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding that you would offer to a friend. These quotes can help shift your mindset from self-criticism to self-acceptance, encouraging you to be more forgiving of your mistakes and imperfections. They can give you insight and validate your feelings, especially during tough times, reminding you that it’s okay to be imperfect and that your worth isn’t defined by how you handle your challenges.

Self-compassion quotes can also inspire positive self-talk. By regularly reading and reflecting on these quotes, you can gradually cultivate a more compassionate inner voice, which can lead to improved emotional resilience, lower stress levels, and a greater overall sense of well-being. They help to nurture a more loving and supportive relationship with yourself, which is essential to help you maintain emotional health.

Reading self-compassion quotes can also improve our relationships with others. When we are more compassionate with ourselves, we are often more compassionate with others. Being kind to ourselves can help us build stronger and more supportive relationships with those around us.

My favourite self-compassion quotes

“When you recover or discover something that nourishes your soul and brings joy, care enough about yourself to make room for it in your life.” – Jean Shinoda Bolen

“The journey toward self-love can be challenging, especially in a world that often imposes unrealistic standards and expectations. However, this inner journey is essential for a full and fulfilling life…The aim is to reach a state where self-love is not conditioned by external successes or validation from others, but is a constant presence guiding our thoughts and actions.” -Marie Chieze

“No other love no matter how genuine it is, can fulfill one’s heart better than unconditional self-love.” – Edmond Mbiaka

“Who will you love if not yourself? Other people? How can you love someone for anything but their raw, naked humanity? How can you say you love someone if it is not for their flaws and quirks, snorts and hurts, triggers and tears? Anything else is not love. It is idealisation. And, as long as you do it to yourself, you will do it to everyone. You will not love anyone or anything until those eyes in the mirror soften up and embrace the beauty that is already within.” -Vironika Tugaleva

“Self-compassion is like a muscle. The more we practice flexing it, especially when life doesn’t go exactly according to plan (a frequent scenario for most of us), the stronger and more resilient our compassion muscle becomes.” -Sharon Salzberg

“Nourishing yourself in a way that helps you blossom in the direction you want to go is attainable, and you are worth the effort.” – Deborah Day

“A moment of self-compassion can change your entire day. A string of such moments can change the course of your life.”-Christopher Germer

“When you extend kindness to yourself, you create a sanctuary of love, acceptance, and peace within your own heart.” – John O’Donohue

“The only thing that was ever wrong with me was my belief that there was something wrong with me. I quit spending my life trying to control myself and began to trust myself. We only control what we don’t trust. We can either control ourselves or love ourselves, but we can’t do both.”-Glennon Doyle

“You have been criticizing yourself for years, and it hasn’t worked. Try approving of yourself and see what happens.”-Louise Hay

“Self-compassion is a way of emotionally recharging our batteries. Rather than becoming drained by helping others, self-compassion allows us to fill up our internal reserves, so that we have more to give to those who need us.” – Kristin Neff

“We don’t make lasting, constructive changes in our lives because of shame or self-loathing. We finally decide we were made for something more. This might come to us as a very small sense of knowing, but it’s a change in perspective, and it is the soil for new life.”– Leeana Tankersley

“Where we think we need more self-discipline, we usually need more self-love.”-Tara Mohr

“To be self-compassionate is not to be self-indulgent or self-centered. A major component of self-compassion is to be kind to yourself. Treat yourself with love, care, dignity and make your well-being a priority. With self-compassion, we still hold ourselves accountable professionally and personally, but there are no toxic emotions inflicted upon and towards ourselves.” – Christopher Dines

“Loving yourself is having reverence ultimately for life. …It’s a deep gratitude for the life you have.”-Brendon Burchard

“When we truly care for ourselves, it becomes possible to care far more profoundly about other people. The more alert and sensitive we are to our own needs, the more loving and generous we can be toward others.”–Eda LeShan

“No amount of self-improvement can make up for any lack of self-acceptance.”-Robert Holden

“True love of self is not narcissistic, nor is it even self-centred. Those traits are nothing but the contrived window-dressing of self-hate. True love of self is simple acceptance. Without it, you can never be happy, nor even fully healthy. Without it, you can never love others.” -Dharma Singh Khalsa M.D. and Cameron Stauth

“I learned…that sometimes there is just very little in life we can control. But one thing we can always control is how we treat ourselves. And that one thing can change everything.”-Leanna Tankersley

“Perfectionism is self-abuse of the highest order.”-Anne Wilson Schaef

“What is happening in your innermost self is worthy of your entire love; somehow you must find a way to work at it.”-Rainer Maria Rilke

“How much we know and understand ourselves is critically important, but there is something that is even more essential to living a wholehearted life: loving ourselves.”-Brené Brown

“One thing is for sure–you will make mistakes. Learn to learn from them, learn to forgive yourself, learn to laugh when everything falls apart because, sometimes, it will. – Vironika Tugaleva

“Perhaps, we should love ourselves so fiercely, that when others see us they know exactly how it should be done.” – Rudy Francisco

“If you are continually judging and criticizing yourself while trying to be kind to others, you are drawing artificial boundaries and distinctions that only lead to feelings of separation and isolation.” – Kristin Neff

“Self-love is learning how to listen to your own heart so you can understand someone else’s.”-Zella Sage

” While you might think it’s a trick, having affection for one’s goofy, crabby, annoying, lovely self is home. This has been my meager salvation.”-Anne Lamott

“If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete.”-Jack Kornfield

“Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy—the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.” -Brené Brown

“Feeling compassion for ourselves in no way releases us from responsibility for our actions. Rather, it releases us from the self-hatred that prevents us from responding to our life with clarity and balance.” -Tara Brach

“The way you treat your own heart is the way you will end up treating everyone else’s.”-John Eldridge

“You can have compassion for yourself-which is not self-pity. You’re simply recognizing that ‘this is tough, this hurts,’ and bringing the same warmhearted wish for suffering to lessen or end that you would bring to any dear friend grappling with the same pain, upset, or challenges as you.” -Rick Hanson

“Compassion links us to others. We share a common humanity with a common wish to be happy, free from suffering and to live with grace.”– Marianne Williamson

“An important aspect of self-compassion is to be able to empathically hold both parts of ourselves–the self that regrets a past action and the self that took the action in the first place.” -Marshall Rosenberg

“If you are unkind to yourself, you will be unkind to others. And if you are negligent of yourself, you will be that to others. Only by feeling compassion for yourself can you feel compassion for others. If you cannot love yourself you cannot love others, and you cannot stand to see others loved. If you cannot treat your own self kindly, you will resent that treatment when you see it in anyone else. If you cannot love yourself, loving others becomes a very painful endeavour with only occasional moments of comfort. In other words, loving others, or how you treat yourself, is your own dose of your own medicine, that you really give to others at the same time.”–Gary Zukav

“We can still be crazy after all these years. We can still be angry after all these years. We can still be timid or jealous or full of feelings of unworthiness. The point is… not to try to throw ourselves away and become something better. It’s about befriending who we already are.”​-Pema Chodron

“When you say ‘Yes’ to others make sure you are not saying ‘No’ to yourself.” -Paulo Cohelo

“To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance.”–Oscar Wilde

“The power of self-kindness can help us to heal our chronic shame and self-loathing. In a world that is often mean-spirited and cruel, a daily practice of kindness and warm-heartedness can make all the difference.” –Christopher Dines

“It’s okay to be a compassionate mess.”-Kristin Neff

“I love myself. The quietest. Simplest. Most powerful. Revolution. Ever.”-Nayyirah Waheed

“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world.”-Lucille Ball

If we take good care of ourselves, we help everyone. We stop being a source of suffering to the world, and we become a reservoir of joy and freshness.”~ Thich Nhat Hanh, How to Love

“Kind words are like honey, sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.”–Proverbs 16:24

“Self-love means valuing yourself as a human being, accepting yourself without conditions, and having a high regard for your own well-being by nurturing it physically, psychologically, and spiritually.” -Rebecca Dolgin

“Remember that self-care is all about you. What works for one person may not work for another, but that’s the beauty of a self-care routine.” -Matthew Glowiak

“Self-compassion motivates like a good coach, with kindness, support, and understanding, not harsh criticism.” -Kristin Neff and Christopher Germer

How can you incorporate self-compassion quotes into your daily routine?

You can become more self-supportive using self-compassionate quotes by:

Using these quotes as affirmations: Start your day by reading a self-compassion quote as part of your morning routine. I don’t do this every day, but when I do, I write the quote on a sticky note and stick it to my laptop, so I see the quote each time I open it. You can automate this by setting up daily notifications with self-compassion quotes on your phone. These can serve as gentle reminders throughout the day to take a breath, be kind to yourself, and reframe any negative self-talk.

Journaling: Write down your favourite self-compassion quotes in your journal. As you may know, I am an enthusiastic prompt creator. I often use a self-compassion quote as a prompt in my journal. I reflect on the quote, how it relates to my current situation, and how I can apply its message to my day. I often also end my day by reading a self-compassion quote before I go to bed. I think about how I can apply it to my experiences that day. This can help me wind down before I fall asleep.

I have been thinking about hosting both online and onsite (here in the southwest of France) one-day retreats, to complement my longer Manifest Your Next Chapter retreats. As self-compassion is such an essential aid to anyone who is struggling through a life change/crisis, it seems logical to make this the subject of my one-day retreats. If you would like to join the waiting list for these retreats, please email me at margarethamontagu@gmail.com.


In addition to the Your Next Chapter retreats that I host at my little French farm near Bordeaux, I have also created a couple of online courses, ex. Determine your Life Purpose as you start your Next Chapter – each course is available with or without one-to-one coaching. To receive warning of last-minute and early-bird specials on all of the above, I invite you to subscribe to my Savoir Vivre Vignettes newsletter which gives immediate access to my free Manifest a Stress-free Life e-course.

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