1. Your digital assistant cheerfully says, “Good morning!” You think:

“And a good morning to you, my silicon friend!” “Is it, though? Let’s see what fresh digital hell awaits.” “Don’t speak to me. You’re not the boss of my morning.” “One day, my ‘morning’ will involve birdsong, not notifications.”

2. A friend suggests you “unplug for the weekend.” Your immediate reaction is:

“Great idea! I’ll put my phone on ‘Do Not Disturb’ for a whole afternoon.” A hollow laugh. “Does my soul have a ‘Do Not Disturb’ mode? Because that’s what I need.” “Yes! I shall leave my laptop behind and venture forth… to the living room to read a book.” The physical sensation of your thumb phantom-scrolling, accompanied by a cold sweat.

3. When was the last time you felt genuinely, uncomplicatedly excited about something?

Just last week, thinking about a new project/hobby. I’m not sure. Does the release of a new season of a show I like count? I can’t recall. My primary emotion is ‘mildly apprehensive anticipation of the next task.’ I feel it now, thinking about the possibility of a real adventure.

4. What does the phrase “finding yourself” currently bring to mind?

A productive afternoon of journaling and goal-setting. Getting lost in a magnificent novel or a fascinating documentary. A vague, slightly alarming suspicion that the ‘self’ you’re supposed to find is currently hiding under a pile of laundry and unanswered emails. The profound need for a wise, experienced guide to hand you a compass and a decent map.

5. Your “check engine” light has been on for a while. Metaphorically speaking, what’s your approach?

“It’s probably just asking for a good, long road trip, right?” “I’m aware of the light. I’m monitoring the situation. I have a spreadsheet for it.” “I’m sure it’s fine. I’ll just turn the radio up.” “I know this isn’t just a minor glitch. I’m ready to look under the hood, but I’d rather not do it alone.”

6. The most appealing form of “connection” right now is:

A stimulating dinner party with fascinating people. The Wi-Fi signal finally reaching the quietest corner of your house. The satisfying *thud* of a thick book landing on your bedside table. A deep, uninterrupted conversation with your own thoughts, preferably while walking.

7. Imagine a path stretching out before you. What does it look like?

A familiar, well-trodden park loop. Comfortable and predictable. A bustling city street, full of energy and interesting shops to pop into. A winding country lane through rolling hills, with no particular destination in sight. The path to my fridge. It’s the only journey I have energy for right now.

8. Someone offers you a blank page. What do you do with it?

Start a to-do list. Gotta be productive! Feel a pang of anxiety about the sheer, empty possibility of it all. See it as a map for a new chapter, but feel unsure where to draw the first line. Begin to write the first line of a story, or perhaps just a single, perfect word.

Retreat Quiz

How Close Are You to Trading Your Life for a Herd of Goats in the Pyrenees?